Weymouth of Falmouth was lost in the fog,
his compass was gone—out of sight.
Lucky for him, the mist would soon thin…
when the sauna shut down for the night.
Tag: UK
Barnum’s Revenge
England’s downs were full of clowns
From Brighton on up to Forfar
But they’d no problem parking
(not even in Barking)
You see, they’d all come in one car.
Forfar is, in fact, in Scotland, but it worked for the rhyme.
Inventory Day
OK, let’s see…
You’ve got a rhinestone shoebox
where you keep your pocket fluff,
a steamer trunk that’s full of
Micronesian powder puffs.
Your wardrobe’s shoulder deep in
iridescent jumping crabs,
while both the walk-in closets
are completely stuffed with rags.
The spare room’s got its own spare room
with little room to spare—
I don’t think Galileo could find anything in there.
Your summer house looks very much
like Selfridges blew up,
and I don’t know why your art museum
needs a monster truck.
Your oil tanker’s oil tank
is not quite big enough—
So yes, I think,
I’m pretty sure that
you’ve got too much stuff.
Crown Privilege
The law firm of Battersea, Butter & Beck
Found themselves flooded right up to their necks
When they filed a complaint seeking royal amends
And Queen Mary threw them right into the Thames.
Crown Fools
Meb and Peb in London town
Tricked the guards and stole the crown
But neither got the hat to fit
The Queen was still attached to it.

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